When life gives you lemons….

I spent about four months at Swedish, in some form or another.  On bed rest at first and then there to be with Nathan every moment I could.  And I was so incredibly blessed that either my Mom or Dan was with me.  They would take turns, when Dan was at work, my Mom would drive down and hang out with me.  When he was off for the weekends, he would drive down and stay.  Talk about blessed!!!  I didn’t have to face anything alone.

My Mom put her own life on hold for FOUR months so I wouldn’t have to go it alone.  She spent the night there with me whenever Dan couldn’t be there, she spent those long days with me, in and out of the NICU.  All the poking and prodding visits, she was there with me!  So incredibly self-less!  She was amazing through it all and we found a way to make the best out of the tough situation.  Some of my favorite memories are of the simplest things!

There were lots of moments which were bright spots along the way.  My Mom and I would enjoy planning our lunch and/or dinner plans.  We found a great pizza place called Mad Pizza and everyday they would have specials.  We’d head over there for lunch and get a slice and a greek salad…delish!  Then we’d head down the street to get a toasted waffle and a starbucks.

Or we’d plan our order from the hospital’s menu.  When I was a patient, I could call and order anything, as often as I wanted.  We ate pretty well when we were there!

We had a gracious friend of a friend who let us stay at her gorgeous house on the water.  A little peace and quiet in the midst of the storm.

We made some great friends too.  There was a group of Moms who had had premature babies who came around to chat with me before the boys were born.  They were a great encouragement to me!!  We also met a couple up in the NICU who had just had a little boy at 24 weeks gestation.  They were/are an amazing Christian couple and we became life-long friends.  (They were told they’d never have a baby and now they are pregnant with their 4th!  Who said miracles don’t happen!?! And their little 24 weeker is a healthy strong little guy now too!)

It was amazing to see Dan as a Dad too.  You think when you get married that you know how someone is going to be as a parent, but to see it in action is pretty amazing.  I still have a picture in my mind of my big, 6’2″ husband holding this little itty bitty baby for his diaper change.  So gently lifting him up while the nurse changed out his bedding…adorable.  This experience definitely drew us closer together and we were able to rely on each other.

I have to say too, now that 6 years have passed, that I am finally at the place where I would say I wouldn’t change anything.  Seriously.  I know that if things were different I wouldn’t have Caleb or Zachary now.  I also know that if Matthew had lived, considering the brain damage he had suffered, I don’t know that his quality of life would have been very good.  He is the happiest he will ever be, no suffering or pain!!  And I can’t even imagine if we hadn’t been able to keep Nathan.  He is amazing and a miracle for sure!!

Plus, I am different now too.  I see the world differently and I think I am more able to empathize with people when they are hurting.  I had so many bright spots and blessings along my way and my prayer is that God will use the experiences we’ve had in such a way that we might be a bright spot along someone else’s path too.